The final flush

My Chemical Toilet News

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This is the last My Chemical Toilet post, for I am now “putting it to bed”.

Say whaaat?

Don’t be sad (but don’t be happy or indifferent, either). It’s been a fun old thing to do, and I hope that since it began in 2007 it’s provided some interesting and amusing stuff to read.

I’m getting on a bit. Now, I’m not necessarily saying that it’s undignified to be writing silly things about music once you’re nearer forty than twenty. And I’m certainly not saying that I’m too old to love music anymore. But keeping the site updated, and feeling the urge to say things about music, has become more and more of an effort over the last year or so. And I think if something like this isn’t fun anymore, it’s kind of pointless to continue with it.

What’s really behind this? Is your back giving you “jip”, old man?

Well, it’s hard to keep track of everything that’s going on, for one thing. I spend less time listening to music now than at any previous point in my adult life, and similarly I spend less time reading about it and forming opinions. These days I tend to read books on the tube rather than listen to music.

Ahhh, so is it because “you can’t even understand what they’re singing”?

I’m not going to say anything like “muh muh muh, all modern music’s rubbish”. It isn’t, not at all. I just don’t have the same desire to seek it out as I once did, and it’s something I’ve been wrestling with for a while.

When the site was on a role I was struggling to find the time to fit in all the things I wanted to write about, but of late the struggle’s been more about not knowing what to write about in the first place. That’s not really an ideal position to be in if you’re running a blog.

Jesus. This is all a bit emo, isn’t it?

FUCK OFF, IT’S MY SITE.

I can’t believe you’re giving up writing – you’re genuinely amazing, you are. Are you going to cut off your hand like that painter did with his ear? Because you’re every bit as talented as he is, you know, and much handsomer.

I still love writing, I still love writing on the internet and I still love writing silly things. It’s just time for me to stop writing about the music, man.

Aren’t you sad? You have no children, so this is pretty much the only thing of any worth you have ever produced, isn’t it?

It is a bit sad for me, because I’ve always been proud of running this thing; and it’s a bit scary to not now have, er, “a thing”. The exposure the site has given me-

HOLD UP – is this going to be a self-aggrandising paragraph about your “influence”?

-has been great in many ways, helping me to get jobs, travel, go to gigs and festivals and stuff. I’ve met – both physically and virtually – a lot of nice folk, and made new friends.

The site has acquired a decent measure of what is referred to in the online arena as “influence”-

TWAT.

-and people have said nice things about it. I’ve been on the BBC “Sound Of” list of, ahem, “tastemakers” for the last couple of years, and was nominated for best blog at the Record Of The Day awards last year. Although, to my mind, turning up so high on lists like this suggests a lack of knowledge of what’s “out there”, music-wise, on the part of some social media types.

You disingenuous, falsely modest bushel hider-underer.

Look, one thing the internet is not short of is music blogs. And I’m fairly sure there are a lot – even in just the UK – with fingers more closely on the pulse, and with more prolific posting regimes than this one. I’m not saying quantity should count more than quality, but I’ve only published about a dozen posts this year, and half of those were nostalgiafests. So, you know, if you work in a field where it’s your job to know who the most influential folk are – don’t just trust what the “experts” tell you.

Testify. I mean, you were never even listed on The Hype Machine! And you call yourself a music blogger!

I’ve never been listed on The Hype Machine because I generally tend not to post MP3s for people to download – for a long time this was a legally dodgy area, and-

You’re a chicken.

-and it was a hassle I couldn’t be bothered with. That’s changed somewhat with services like SoundCloud. But there aren’t a great many music blogs that write amusing things, so I hope I provided something a bit different somewhere along the way.

I think they’re about to roll the music, so it’s probably time to wrap it up.

I’d like to say thanks to all the people who have contributed to the site over the years, and to those who made the effort to post a comment (even if you were a bit of a dick; and especially if I was a bit of a dick). It’s nice to feel like people listen to what you say, even if they hate it.

Thanks an’ all to the good people who have ever retweeted posts, linked to the site or recommended it/me in any way. Thanks also to Phil Martin for the triffic illustrations you see dotted around (and the MCT logo), and Power On Communications for the design, hosting and admin helps.

OK, you luvvie, that’s the thanks. Any “sorrys”?

Sorry to all the public relations people whose emails I ignored. You chaps and chapesses are wayyy too plentiful, and I am filled with foreboding at the task I have in front of me in attempting to be removed from your mailing lists.

So where are you going to go to, my lovely?

I’m writing regularly for the marvellous LUV & HAT, which I enjoy enormously. If I have pressing things to say about other stuff it’ll be at stuartwaterman.com, and I really must get back to my non-racist Tumblr, Bring Back Lost Lover.

I’ve changed my Twitter handle from @MyChemToilet to @stu_waterman (sorry about the underscore, I tried to avoid it) – if you unfollow me because I’m not all about the music anymore, or because you find this post grossly lachrymose, I understand one hunnert percent. If you’d like to offer me the opportunity to write your Christmas round robin newsletter or something, you can contact me at waterman.stuart at gmail.com.

And your final words are…

Love music, not genres. Toodles!

12 comments

  1. Kat says:

    Between you and UK Resistance hanging up your coats, I’m bereft at the thought of using this internet thing again. *sniffles*

  2. Ah
    Bye.
    Excellent name for a blog.
    Will check you at at Luv and Hat then.
    xxxx

  3. Robyn says:

    A terrible (awful terrible awful awful understandable but horrible) bidness; I shall miss this large orange contraption very much. Thank you for all the LARFS and the THINKING about TUNES all these years, AND *fantastic* final post. Hit all the right notes, and very funny.

    I am not crying.

    Long live LUV&HAT and BBLL. You go girlfriend, etc. x

  4. Robyn says:

    Oh fuck, I have to take this off my Twitter profile now, dunneye?

  5. Alex S says:

    Okay, I don’t hate you. But I’m very sad to see one of my favourite blogs (and the only music writing I ever read) die.

    You are a very funny chap, and only slightly racist.

    x

  6. Rachel says:

    Yeah yeah — but MORE IMPORTANTLY, where am I gonna get ideas/leads for new chunes now? It is all about me, anyway. (Best of luck! to quote Stanley.)

    xo

  7. Katie Lee says:

    This is very sad. It must be stopped. I’m writing a letter to the internet police.

  8. FAREWELL TO A GREAT SITE.

    TAKE A LOOK AT MY WRITE-UP ON RADIOHEAD:http://anti-est.blogspot.com/2011/04/gods-of-independence-radiohead.html

    IF YOU DIG THE WEBSITE AND MIGHT WANT TO CONTRIBUTE EVERY NOW AND AGAIN, FEEL FREE TO CONTACT ME.

  9. Darika says:

    Dear

    I am a huge fan of your . LOVE what you’re doing.

    I would like to invite you to a select event for influential bloggers in return we would like you to post a few viral video blogs on your site.

    Feel free to drop me a line if you’re interested.

  10. [...]  notice. A bit. And sort of, er, remove me from their mailing lists. A lot. However, despite my final post explaining fairly clearly that it was over, I still get lots (and lots) of emails from people [...]

  11. Claire says:

    I have returned to weep. I still miss this site. Luv and Hat is not hateful enough for it has a positive side. I miss the bitter enthusiasm.

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