Ladies & gentlemen: The Rolling Stones are rather engaging to watch on your home entertainment system

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Feels a bit weird, writing a post about The Rolling Stones. You tend to assume everyone knows everything there is to know about them, don’t you? But even hardcore Stones bores have been awaiting the release of Ladies And Gentlemen: The Rolling Stones on DVD, as it’s been unobtainable by legal means for decades.

It was filmed over a few shows in 1972 as the band toured their masterpiece Exile On Main Street, but has only been available to fans once, in the 80s, on something called “VHS”, in a country called “Australia”, before being deleted. On October 11th it finally comes out on DVD and Blu-ray.

And however many times you’ve heard Stones songs and seen Mick peacock it up, it would be a studiously aloof, soulless berk who could watch Ladies & Gentlemen without being seduced by the ramalanga rock n’ roll spirit contained therein. “Bitch”, “Jumpin’ Jack Flash”, “Brown Sugar”… if you feel no urge to at least tap your foot when these songs are played, especially in their live incarnations with their riffs n’ their horns n’ their sheer Stonesyness, chop it off. You deserve no foot. No foot for you.

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The first digital music box with two revolutionary dance tones

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I don’t think the i-Jammer – or indeed the E-Bumper – is available in the UK yet. But I will jam the jizzle of anyone who tries to beat me to the front of the queue when they go on sale.

[from Tim & Eric Awesome Show on Adult Swim]

Jimmy Page looks like a Native American

Gadgets, Garments, Gifts & Gear

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royal-mail-jimmy-page-2

Here’s Jimmy Page in iconic record emporium Rough Trade West, on which he is about to place a tribal curse because it was constructed atop his ancestors’ graveyard.

Not really, he’s promoting the fact that Royal Mail are taking a break from being all strikey to release some stamps based on “classic albums”. Incidentally, is there a more beardy phrase in all of musicdom than “classic album”? Negatory.
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GG Allin bobblehead doll comes complete with excrement-splattered torso

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gg_allin_dollIf you don’t know who GG Allin is (was), you have a fun journey of discovery ahead. He was a singer of sorts I suppose, but his Wikipedia entry puts it a bit better:

Allin is best remembered for his notorious live performances that typically featured wildly transgressive acts such as Allin defecating and urinating onstage, rolling in feces and often consuming excrement, committing self-injury, performing naked, and committing violent actions toward the audience

How the hell are you supposed to play this thing?

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victor_gama_tartul

That’s a musical instrument, that is. I don’t know what parts of your body go where. Maybe you’re supposed to ride it?

It was designed by someone called Victor Gama, but beyond that I’m lost. Any ideas?

Shaun Ryder jigsaw virtually begs you to lose pieces

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shaun-ryder-jigsaw
From the same people who brought you the now-legendary (and yet somehow not sold out) 20-inch canvas print of TV’s Paul Ross comes this simply darling jigsaw of Happy Mondays singer Shaun Ryder.

Currently languishing with a sales rank of 50,703 in Amazon’s Kitchen & Home section, this portrait of Shaun quite literally smashed to pieces would make an ideal gift for someone you really fucking hate.

Only

iPhone technoBox app set to create nation of mobile techno DJs :(

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iphone.jpgSo, someone you know has iPhone. You’re happy for them. You’ve emitted an acceptable number of “ooh”s and “ahh”s over iPhone’s shiny loveliness. You’re a little bit jealous. That’s perfectly natural.
Then iPhone starts impacting on your social life. Nights in the pub become distinctly iPhone-centric. If your friend isn’t showing you what iPhone can do, they’re Tweeting, Facebooking, emailing, YouTube-ing.
Go to the toilet and you know that when you return you’re going to need to wait about another half an hour before your companion can tear him/herself away from iPhone. You left them alone with iPhone, you see. Never leave anyone alone with iPhone.
Well, pretty soon your friend’s antisocial iPhone use is going to extend beyond social networking – to creating music. And for that, you will need to thank technoBox.

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A Tribe Called Quest collaborate with Nike Air Jordan on some CRACK! apparel

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air_jordan_a_tribe_called_quest.jpgNext month is a big one for thirtysomething conscious hip-hop sneaker freaks, for it sees Nike release an Air Jordan collaboration with none other than A Tribe Called Quest. To the left you can see the trainer in question (click image to enlarge).
Looks like they’ll be retailing for upwards of $100, but if your budget is more two-digit-y maybe you’d be better off with a t-shirt inspired by the sleeve design of Tribe’s classic Midnight Marauders album. Click through for a pic…

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My Chemical Toilet's music-related Christmas gift guide

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Do you know someone who “likes music”? Do you need to buy them a gift? Have you found yourself gazing glassy-eyed at the CD section in Tesco? Then you will be pleased to hear that this collection of gift suggestions is for you.
I’ve attempted to assemble a slightly offbeat list of (at times highly tenuous) music-related gifts, so hopefully this will provide some inspiration.
Musical Instruments
Coloured Musical Instruments
karacha_red_violin.jpgI just asked the boss if, when our website traffic reaches 5 people, I can have my own My Chemical Toilet colour-coded violin duo to stand by my desk and surround me with melody throughout the working day. She said no, and gave me some kind of formal warning.
karacha_yellow_violin.jpgBut that hasn’t stopped me identifying the precise instruments my fantasy duo will play. If these red and yellow items aren’t your chosen recipient’s thing, you can always try one of the other myriad shades available at Karacha.com. There’s even a black one for the teenager flirting with gothism.

Personalised David Hasselhoff posters, for the student/grandmother in your life

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santa_hoff.jpgIf you know someone who is an ironic/unironic/”oh God I don’t even know if I’m being ironic anymore” David Hasselhoff fan, you might want to bookmark the shit out of universalposter.com. And/or cut said David Hasselhoff fan out of your life like mould from a block of cheese.
But you can’t really do that if said fan is your Nan, can you? What you can do is get a special message wroted onto a poster of (sigh) “The Hoff”. Because that’s what universalposter.com does – it takes messages and prints them digitally “on your poster in handwriting style that accurately mimics the celebrities’ writing style, accompanied by a digital facsimile of their signature.”
See after the jump for some of the lovely poses The Hoff strikes on his posters.

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