That's not very nice, is it? How would 50 masticate all the stuff from the Candy Shop with no gnashers?

But believe you me, this is just the latest in a long, pointless, bitter beef between the two rap chaps. It got me thinking - can they even remember why they hate each other so? Did it all begin with something trivial, like maybe 50 borrowed Joe's pen and forgot to give it back but Joe was too proud to ask for it back and maybe then he saw 50 using it at a fan signing or something and then got all bitter about it and was like, no way?

Conjecture, all of it. I needed facts - if not solid ones, then at least some that have been reported by semi-reliable sources. After a good 3 seconds of semi-coherent online searching on my part, I am pleased to be able to present you with The Story Of How 50 Cent And Fat Joe Fell Out. Read the whole sorry saga over the page.

- First, apparently 50 Cent was left off a song called "New York" by Fat Joe.

- 50 was like, "nuh-uh!", so he came up with a ditty called "Piggy Bank", in which he made his feelings on this matter clear. Then he turned Fat Joe into a little puppet that got beaten up in the video.

- Then maybe some other stuff happened.

- Then, on TV, 50 Cent said he would quite like to eliminate Mr. Joe from "the rap game", actuallypleasethankyouverymuch.

- THEN Mr.Joe came back with the big (verbal) guns, branding Mr. Cent "a clown".

- THENTHENTHEN Mr.Cent came up with a song about leaving Mr.Joe's brains on the floor, like so much doggy doo-doo.

- Somewhere around this point, Joey Fat tried to lay the beef to rest by offering 50 the chance to give his dinkle a little mouth love.

- That didn't seem to work, maybe cos he also called 50 a coward, and now Fat has gone and said "I just wanna bust them f*cking new teeth that n*gga got. That's just my approach."

And that's how we find ourselves in this horrible situation right now. Heavens.

Boys boys boys! Can't we all just get along?? What's that you say? That wouldn't help sell any records? Golly, I suppose you have a point.

And if you think I'm making this up, here's Mr. Joe talking about it while wearing lots of heavy jewellery.

[video: allaccessglobal.com]

[via SOHH.com, MTV.co.uk, Hecklerspray]

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